There are all sorts of familiar, awkward encounters in the hallways: when the door to the stairwell won’t open and you’re forced to struggle for ten seconds before admitting defeat and trying the other door, swearing and then realizing that your teacher is right behind you or trying to dodge someone walking in the opposite direction.
But with spring in the air and prom right around the corner, students have been experiencing close encounters of a new kind. Lately, couples are engaging in more provocative public displays of affection, or PDA. What might’ve been cute in the final scene of a Hilary Duff movie has turned into a nauseating and common occurrence for students.
Walking by couples playing tonsil hockey can be an uncomfortable daily ritual, prompting mixed emotions. There’s denial (don’t look, don’t look), shock (are they even allowed to do that in the hallway?), incredulity (It’s like he’s giving her vertical CPR), anger (get a room!) and sadness (why am I so alone?).
And while senior Alyssa Sinkfeld vocally opposes the outlandish PDA she sees in the halls, others believe they have the right to enjoy themselves.
One junior girl says that she and her boyfriend acknowledge the discomfort of others but don’t let it hinder their affections.
“If you love somebody you don’t care about other people, you just want to show that love and that passion,” she says. “If it makes you uncomfortable, then I’m sorry but I’m not going to hold back because you can’t be bothered to look away.”
But come on, young lovers, look at it from our point of view. Aside from the distasteful visual, your canoodling in the corridors causes traffic jams. One couple smooching in Whittier Woods can cause a backup straight to the bottleneck.
This passionate predicament isn’t limited to the hallways; hormonal teens have found a number of places to get their snuggle on.
These days, there’s more action in the cozy cafeteria booths than there was at the Homecoming dance. PDA participants, instead of parading your infatuation around the lunchroom, take a cue from the freshmen at football games and take it to the woods behind the tennis courts.
They say that communication is the key to any relationship. So instead of engaging in a frenzied lip-lock with your main squeeze between classes, use those five minutes of face time to engage your mouths in conversation – maybe learn something about each other.
Or, if you’re looking for PDA style points, come up with a seriously cool Parent Trap –worthy handshake with your partner. It’s creative, and a far less awkward visual display for the average hallway roamer.
At the end of the day, a fist bump is the only kind of bump and grind that belongs in the halls.